Tuesday, August 30, 2005

99 Things about the J-man

I've seen this on a couple other blogs and I figured I'd give it a try...especially since this will be my 99th post. I'll probably give up before I reach 99, but here's to trying.

1. I am 27 years old
2. I run a pool service company that my father began 20 years ago
3. I am left handed
4. I swing a baseball bat and golf club right handed though
5. I could eat Chinese food every day and did so for 10 days once
6. I have a beagle named Chloe
7. I have a cat (not my choice) named Kiki (not my choice either)
8. I have a tattoo of a monkey on my left hip
9. I always grab a new glass whenever I want a drink, even if I know I have another one I just used in the other room. This is not because I'm OCD, I'm just too lazy to go get the other one.
10. I drive an Infiniti G35 which has puke remnants on the right side now
11. I live with my girlfriend of 5+ years
12. I am color blind
13. Because I am color blind, I accidentally put red mulch in my front yard garden.
14. I only use Irish Spring soap
15. I don't pee in the shower. I have in the past, but I don't make it a habit any longer.
16. I sleep on the right side of the bed, even when my girlfriend isn't in it.
17. I sleep with two pillows. One for my head and one under my right shoulder.
18. I don't smoke cigarettes
19. I drink alcohol...regularly.
20. My favorite drink is Capt. & Coke
21. My favorite beer is Michelob Light
22. I gamble on sports, especially the NFL. But I'm not picky.
23. I like to play sports, especially football. But I'm not picky.
24. I'm a decent cook, though I've made some suspect dishes in the past. (Cheetoh Chicken Parmesian)
25. I took 4 semesters of cooking classes in high school. Why not?
26. I used to make dough balls in these classes and throw them out the window at cars
27. I also used to use ketchup containers that I would get from Roy Rogers as little grenades to throw at cars.
28. I was somewhat destructive in high school.
29. I got a guitar for Christmas but only learned to play three chords.
30. I started writing a book (which had a really good concept) 6 years ago and I'm still not near finished.
31. I make these mix CDs
32. Don't mind him, he's Oriental.
33. I belong to Blockbuster Online and Netflix, and copy every movie I get for my own personal library. (which is like 300+ by now)
34. I read other people's blogs even though I don't know them...except Catheter Man, I know him.
35. I haven't done anything productive here at work today outside of answering the phone
36. I am wearing my knee brace today, though I haven't worn it in three days.
37. I should have worn my knee brace the last three days, because now my knee is killing me and kept me from getting a good night's sleep last night
38. I only read books when I'm going on a trip that involves a plane flight
39. I think I've read more about the NFL and MLB in the last three years than I've read about anything else in the world my entire life.
40. I don't have any show that I watch regularly on TV.
41. I have never seen one episode of any of the HBO shows or The OC
42. I enjoy getting a woman's phone number even though I have no intention of ever calling her.
43. I enjoy mocking other people and the weird things they do for my own enjoyment
44. I prefer getting a table at a bar over standing
45. I like my eggs scrambled or as an omlette only
46. I hate snakes though I've only been bitten by one once in my life and it was tiny
47. I hate the sound of small children singing
48. I hate driving around in parking lots
49. I can not be wearing shoes in a messy room or I go absolutely ape shit
50. I just had Chinese food for dinner
51. I used to steal porno magazines from Walden Books when I was too young to buy them
52. I still think I would steal porno magazines from Walden Books because who wants to be the perv buying porno magazines from Walden Books anyway
53. When I grow a goatee, it is red even though my hair is brown
54. I don't wear my glasses when I go out to the bars because no one will talk to the dork wearing glasses
55. Since I don't wear my glasses, I usually end up talking to ugly chicks
56. OK, I can't blame it on my glasses
57. I go by many nicknames including my last name, Slacker, Jupac, and Slappy
58. I have never been referred to as the J-man...which is funny since that is the alias I chose for this site
59. I am not using my real name or my company's name in this site because who would want to be associated with this garbage anyway
60. I busted up my nose when I was a junior in college when I passed out midway through throwing a beer bottle at a "sorority" and landed head first onto the edge of a wall
61. I still have a hole in the inside of my nose from this event
62. I was born on December 28, which means no one is ever around for my birthday and I get hosed with the Christmas/Birthday combo gifts
63. I was raised as a Jew so this shouldn't have even been possible
64. I never had a Bar Mitzvah
65. My mother is not Jewish
66. I went to Hebrew School for only 3 years because my family moved a couple times when I was young and we never got around to it
67. I refused to go to Hebrew School on Saturdays and would sit in the congregation bathroom and play Tetris on my Gameboy for the whole two hours
68. I am probably going to hell
69. Yeah, 69! Woo hoo.
70. I just did 69. Yeah, 69! Woo hoo.
71. I used to work at a late night restaurant place where you would call numbers for people's orders, and I used to scream like an idiot every time we would call for 69.
72. I figured out that I am the maturity equivalent of a 13 year old thanks to meeting one and discovering our similarities in humor
73. I think Mitch Hedberg was one of the best comedians I have ever seen in person...may he rest in peace.
74. I never floss
75. I work approximately 80 hours a week from April through June
76. I work approximately 25 hours a week from January through February
77. I pee sitting down when I wake up in the middle of the night and have to go, so that I don't have to turn on the light or even open my eyes
78. I have woken up on the toilet after doing this and forgetting to open my eyes and go back to bed
79. I have never eaten snails or frogs legs
80. I have eaten venison and alligator
81. I have never lived by myself...ever.
82. I am part Australian, Scottish, and Polish
83. I have never been to Australia, Scotland or Poland
84. Outside the US, I've only been to England, Canada and Mexico, plus some Caribbean islands
85. I've lived in Maryland, DC, North Carolina, and California
86. I voted for Bush
87. I picked the Kentucky Derby winner correct 4 out of the past 5 years.
88. I know nothing about horse racing
89. I have been to New Orleans during Mardi Gras...and it smelled like a dumpster
90. I always snooze once when the alarm goes off in the morning
91. I wake up to Mix 107.3 because I already hate everyone on their morning show
92. I listen to pump up music before I play sports, but I'm still never really pumped up when the game starts
93. If I can't remember the name of a song, I will not stop searching until I remember it.
94. I quote movies so much that I am often asked, "What's that from?" even when I make up my own joke
95. I have only been punched in the face once, and that was by my friend, Joe
96. I have only punched someone in the face once, and that was my brother, Glen
97. I'm almost done
98. I usually never finish things
99. I must be getting over that stage

And that's the news on the J-man. Stay classy, San Diego.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

dude.. your cat's name is kiki?

The J Man said...

Yeah, I know. Not my choice. I have never called it by that name, going instead with the standard "kitty"

DeCoMpOsEd said...

kiki..haha... i agree on the chinese food ..i love that.. even though i knew i was eating cat once.. in china town ..it was still good.