Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Did we really need that?

Last night, I went to the mall for dinner around 8:30.  When I got there, I remembered that I had a couple paychecks that I hadn't had a chance to deposit.  (It's the Summer...I don't have a lot of free time, and I have no free time when banks are open).  There's a Capital One bank with ATM machines there, so I grabbed by paychecks, as well as another check I had, and made a plan to deposit them after dinner.

So, it's around 9:30 when I finally make it to the bank.  It's obviously closed, but the ATMs are still open, so I figure I'll just fill out a deposit slip and put the checks in the envelope at the ATM.

I head right for the little table and start filling out the deposit slip when Danielle sees a sign on the ATM that you don't need to do it that way anymore.

You see, in my day, we told the ATM how much money we were depositing.  Then we put that money in an envelope and the machine processed the deposit.  However, now we're apparently in this amazing future world where instead, I just put a stack of checks in the ATM machine, it scans them, and tells me how much they add up to, then I confirm the deposit, and a new generation of people that don't know how to add on their own can be created.

So, my first impression is "Wow, that's awesome.  It's the future!!"

Then I put my stack of checks in, the machine sputters for a bit, then returns them and says that it can't make the deposit at this time.

Perhaps, a minute later is when this stupid POS will start doing its job, so I try it again.  Sputter, delay, returned checks and another slip saying it can't make the deposit.

"Maybe it can't read them?  Maybe just try one" Danielle suggests.

Makes sense, let's give it a try.  Or maybe it's just this machine.  I'll try the other one, since there's another machine right next to it.

So, I go through the whole process again, which includes inserting my ATM card, entering my PIN, pressing the button for 'deposit', then 'to checking', the 'confirm' that I'm ready to insert my checks.  This time I only put in one check. 

Again, it sputters.  Then I get this error message:

"We are unable to return your check at this time."

Then the machine goes black.

I'm not even shitting you.  This seriously happened.

I was not on TV.  No wacky host jumped out to tell me I was punked.  No horns went off that I was the big winner of some bizarre ATM game. 

Nope, the machine took my check, told me to go fuck myself, and went to sleep for the night.

So, I'm left without a check.  Without a receipt of any sort stating that it took my check.  And no indication whether it actually counted the deposit.

I ended up having to insert my ATM card three times, enter my PIN three times, push the series of buttons to choose a deposit three times, and the super scanner failed all three times.

Technology...you suck.  And did we really even need that?