Top 10: No Woman, No Cry

For my first weekly Top 10 list, I present to you:

The Top 10 Things No Woman Wants to Hear
10) "I'm going out drinking with my buddies tonight."
9) "I'm going to Las Vegas with my buddies, leaving tonight."
8) "The NCAA tournament starts today, I'll be in the basement watching TV for the next four days."
7) "Yes, that does make you look fat."
6) "Uh oh, I think it broke."
5) "My old girlfriend is coming to visit." (any reference to old girlfriend would probably do, but this would have to be the tops)
4) "It's not going to suck itself." (saw this on a shirt, classy)
3) "Cooking and cleaning isn't my job."
2) "A ring...that's a good one. Ha."
1) "Baby, Ron Mexico is just a name I use every now and then."