Brain Farts 4

Well, I know I've been sparse on the posting, but I'm trying to bring you guys quality instead of quantity. Nah, I'm just lazy. And in that spirit of laziness, you're not even getting a full post, instead here is my fourth installment of brain farts...not as good as the real shit, but still funny.

• Don't you think that people should have to pass some sort of written test in order to drive bigger cars and SUVs? Perhaps, the larger the car, the harder the test? And the test for women is harder than that for men, just to be on the safe side? And the test for Asian people is nearly impossible, just to be on the really safe side? I swear it took this one lady 10 minutes to pull her SUV into a parking spot at my work, and I just had to sit there and wait. And here's the ironic part...she was driving a "Navigator."
• Does anyone else think, just for a second or two, that the new Mariah Carey song, "Shake You Off" might have something to do with shaking that last bit of pee out at the urinal? (Now, you'll never be able to listen to that song the same again. You're welcome.)
• My girlfriend got the cat a collar with a bell on it, so now she looks AND sounds like a dog chew toy.
• If you go to a Greek restaurant and order a gyro ("he-ro") and they call it a "jai-ro," is that a bad sign?
• This isn't a funny one (were the others?), but tonight is the second and possibly championship rounds of my indoor football league. Unfortunately, the first game is against the team of fast, obnoxious players who were our only loss during the regular season. In preparation for the game, I did not shower yesterday and have not yet showered today. Try and cover that, bitches.

Davidson v. Georgetown tomorrow...football at its finest. Have a good weekend, all.