Painting a Nursery

You ever see those lovely commercials, where a husband and wife are playfully and lovingly painting a nursery for their soon-to-be new arrival.  Well, here's the reality:

• Your wife is not gonna be there, because the fumes from the paint are "harmful to the baby."
• It's gonna be like 100 degrees in the room because it's hot out and you need the windows open, plus there's no blinds because you needed to remove them in order to paint.
• Because it's so hot, you're only wearing a pair of shorts, but you're still sweating your ass off
• Paint is getting everywhere because the roller spits little mists of paint all over your hand and face.  And somehow you got paint on your toes, and left a bunch of marks on the floor?
• You know after covering half a wall that you're going to have to put on at least a second coat, which means when you're "done", you're at best halfway there.
• You're already 3/4 of the way through the only can of paint your wife bought you and you're still not done with the first coat, so guess who's going to Home Depot...on a Sunday...to get more.
• And after you complete all of this painstaking labor, you know the little jerk is gonna piss, shit, and draw all over the walls in crayons or something all before he's three years old.

Where's that commercial, Behr???